Trying To Fit In
74My Blessing, My tiny little brother,my best friend
I am the Big Sister now. First time holding my little brother.
New girl on the block
- Moving to a new area, a new home, a new neighborhood. Going to attend a new school, meeting to new friends. Majority of children that attends school have clinche's, students hang out in their own crowd. If your a new student if you don't fit in you get bullied,teased, sometimes threaten.
- When many times I turn my Television on; I'll hear sometimes what catches my attention, news broadcast, the news cast person is broadcasting about a school shooting. The children are young,hearing the news about school shooting it breaks my hearts and I'll sit down on my sofa and break down in tears. Our public schools,colleges,universities are getting unsafe today. Many parents are deciding which is good to home-school their children. Private schools are getting just as bad.
- From the light my own experience growing up when I attend schools strating from the time I started kindergarten up to seventh grade which I decided to drop out of school because the circumstances. Anyways; as I was saying; I was bullied,was jumped,beaten up, all because the way I dressed,way I looked. I had to wear dresses because I was a mennonite girl, wear a covering upon my head. I went to a private school but yet I was bieng bullied so much that it came down it effected my grades,my self-esteem and where I started feeling depressed and angry becuase I did not feel secure or safe going to school so I dropped out of school in the seventh grade.,I could not even trust the teachers so I had nowhere to turn,nobody that I could trust; I hated school, the teachers.
- It is sad that a child is being bullied by another child or other children because they are different, or they don't wear the fancy name brand clothes, whatever the case may be. I strongly believe that the diciplne starts from home, attitudes,personaliies begins from home. Back when I was going to school they did not have the bully law as they do today.
- Children should feel safe when they go to school,feel safe when they walk out their front door,safe walking to school, not feel afraid,dominated,ashame,and feel uncomfortable. They should be able to know always that they can go to someone and trust in that person that the student may feel comfortable talking about the situation. Our schools today have gotten worse. There is a high percentage of drop outs, it just not the students, you'll find some teachers that has favoritism in a class room. and other students seeing this it does cause friction in the classroom and among students.
- As I have experience through my school days I came to hate school,afraid to attend classes and living with that fear it had effect my grades,changed my personality and even my attitude towards teachers,schools I attended. It also effected me in ways I don't trust human kind. I remember many days I came home crying, tears rolling down my eyes,living with the fear walking to school. Always watching my back fear that a student is hiding in a alley or other hiding places just waiting and watching me to jump me for this has happen already to me, for I have experience this. A pack of girls jumped me and beated me up where I ended up having a seizure and had to being taking to the hopsital.
- I became angry but because I believe that violence is not the answer, the bible states turn the other cheek I submit it in God's hand. Even today in my ly adult years it stills effects me and haunts me where I am afraid to make friends,afraid to trust,live in isolation, a loner. My best friend that I came to trust is not human. My best friend happens to be my chihuahua that I adopted from a shelter.
- It did however made me a strong person in my faith, and lean and trust more in My Saviour. I have a found a prayer in my Daily Word that helps me get through the days and heal my memories from my school days. Like to share.
- Prayer for Protection:
- The light of God surrounds me; The Love of God enfolds me; The power of God protects me; The presence of God watches over me. Wherever I am or I go, God is with me.
- When I bow my head down in prayer every morning which I do, I pray for the girls that bullied me, I pray for many children that are being bullied because they are differnt. In God's eyes we are all different but special and God does not have any favoritism. He loves us all.
- Today, my ten granddaughter comes home from school for she attends a public school, she comes home upset,angry,confused, she comes to me says; Grandma, the kids in school makes fun of me. I am honored and blessed that she trusts me enough to be able to come to me,talk to me about what is going on and what is bothering her. The other day I was getting her ready for school, as I was brushing her hair, out the blue she said, grandma I hate school,wish I did not have to go to school. My heat sank when she told me so I sit her down and told her the story in brief detail about my school days. I knew why she hated school but I told her she can always come to me, I will listen.
- I ask my ten year old granddaughter why are the kids picking on you, come on grandma you know why but I wanted to hear it from her mouth. Finally she was telling me. She said because grandma, they make fun of my clothes and shoes. Her dad and mom got layed off of their jobs so they ahve to buy my granddaughter's clothes from thrift stores or goodwills or they are given to my granddaughter from a neighbor and I make some of my granddaughters clothes. I told my grandaughter that the clothes I make for her are special because not only they are made by grandma's own hands but they are made with lots of love. Children can be rude,ignorant,or come from homes theirself that are not christian homes so sweetie you have a lot to be thankful for,your special because you have good christian family.
- Sweetie I say to my granddaughter, remember that you are special and very loved not only from your family but God loves you and he will rpotect you. It is however effecting my granddaughters grades,her attitude towards school and her teachers,her personality. She has this big heart and always have a smile on her face she keeps continue trying to fit in and make friends. See my granddaughter lives with a disability and can not do as much as other children can do but she never gives up trying either. I tell her every day before she leaves to school I love her,have a blessed sunshine day,be strong,remember you are special. God loves you too,will protect you.
- I also tell my granddaughter even though you have feelings of being down at times, so adults too some days but you must never give up on yourself sweetie or feel hopeless. My granddaughter is an incredibly loving,spiritual little girl. I say my granddaughter, it doesn't matter how strong we are we all have our bad times,down times,even joyous and happy times in life. We need to believe in hope and prayer sweetie,most important,believe in strengthening our foundation of our faith because every day of our life is built upon that foundation of hope and prayers.
- Bulliness will only break you down if you allow it, having faith and putting your trust in God will help you face whatever comes your way. I am slowly and gradually healing from school days being bullied, today I pray for those who bullied me. Today I pray for many children who are still being bullied,pray for our teachers and schools to have a stand,get more involved to stop bulliness violence.
- I learn to be careful to try not to make someone cry...cuz God counts every tears! God knows it all. We are all God's children,made from his hands,part of his creation, not made to be walked on, or be bullied in any way, not from thier heads to be superior but from God's precious hands to be treated equal,with love,be protected.
